Conversations with 5 Year Olds

While driving home this evening...

J: Slow down, dad! You don't want to speed the hump!

I: Whaa...The speed bump?

J: No, the hump. It's bigger than just a bump.

~~~

S: Mo-oooom! Tell Jason he needs to talk to me. I keep asking him questions and he just annoys me.

Me: It's "ignores." He's ignoring you.

S: Yeah. That, too. Tell him to talk to me.

~~~

Me: Jason, what was the best thing about today.

J: Nothing. Today was a horrible day. I almost drowned. I hurt my finger...

Me: Can't you just find one thing that was good from today?

J: Well, dinner was pretty good.

~He did not drown. He got water up his nose.

~~~

S: Momma, why can't I have all of Jason's cars.

Me: Because they're Jason's. What would he play with if you took his cars?

S (grabs the cars and looks through them): He can have this one.

Me: Um, Shawn, that's a block, not a car.

S: Yeah. He can still play with that. No wait. (takes it back) He can just wait until I'm done.

~Doesn't that sound fair? Sigh.

~~~

Shawn's favorite thing from the day was playing with Jason's cars.

Jason's favorite thing from the day was dinner. lol